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I'm starting this site as a central location for family and friends to connect about anything and everything, especially something spiritual. My motivation is the kick off of our first-ever all-family Passover celebration!

This event has been a year in the making, although I didn't realize it until recently. A year ago, I left school for spring break, grabbing a box full of books on my way out the door just in case we were out for a while due to the recent recognition of coronavirus outbreak. Little did I know we would be on remote learning for the rest of the year. This and the political and social upheaval that began to get ugly during that same timeframe sent me on a spiral of emotional and mental distress that ultimately resulted in a spiritual awakening. By the way, I never looked at any of those books :)

As a divorced middle-aged woman with grown children (Jessica and Kieran <3), I spent spring break and the next few weeks sitting alone in my house, hovering over a constant news feed of covid, protests, and politics. My mental and emotional health plummeted, as I know was the case for many at that time. I researched 24/7, not sleeping or eating well in my isolated state. As I absorbed the death and destruction around me, life felt so hopeless. I saw racism, cruelty, selfishness, narcissism, and a twisted sense of what it meant to be a Christian silhouetted against the backdrop of a sickness that seemed unstoppable.

Then at a time when I felt the most vulnerable and alone mentally and emotionally, my students rejected me. As we finished the year on remote learning, I tried to keep on keeping on with my students and programs. I planned zoom meetings, converted acting activities to work online, offered to continue the play we were doing as a zoom production, and made what were intended to be engaging, community-inspiring posts daily on our team chat. Not only did I receive an underwhelming response (I know they were suffering, too), they took the opportunity to respond to my posts with attacks on my teaching/coaching. I've been a workaholic my whole life. This isn't often recognized as a problem, but it truly can be. I've never felt confident in myself, but my career has been one area where I have received some positive feedback about who I am. My hard work has always seemed to achieve something positive that I could take pride in. This was my safe zone, the place I felt somewhat stable and certain, and it had been stripped away.

In my mental and emotional distress, I sought journals, therapy apps and bots, and began looking for an online therapist. Those are all great ideas btw. However, in the midst of what seemed like a whirlwind, God was calling to me in a still quiet voice. In my journal, I can actually SEE the moment I reached out to Him in desperation and heard Him respond with an invitation to grasp what He was offering: not an escape from suffering (He is perfectly honest), but an opportunity to gain understanding and hope. My journal evolves from visible tears on the page and expressions of pain and hopelessness to new understandings of who I am to Him, my purpose, and His help in turning suffering into something worthwhile for Him and for me.

There is a lot more to fill in the gap between the beginning of this journey to now, but for the moment, I want to focus on two things:

1. God is calling ALL OF US to arise and shine His light at this important time.

2. He has been preparing me to share a Passover observance with my family and friends. I pray that you will join me!

Love, Me